Still alive

Those people that walk around saying, "I LOVE to work out, it feels so good!", they are flipping crackheads! It doesn't feel good, it hurts and it is hard to breathe and you get all nasty sweaty. What feels good is being able to SAY "I love to work out. It feels so good!" not the actual workout, but the finish.

I met another woman from church at the gym this morning. She finished her workout before I did and came over to say hi. It was just a sweet hello and then she told me that her workout was more for her sanity. In my short, shallow heaves of air I replied, "yea, me too". She then waved bye and left. All I could think was, I am such a moron! Me, with my abundance of fat, just working out for my SANITY?? Ok, my workout is for my brain, it has nothing to do with my large hiney or winged arms or that set of tires around my waist!

But there is some truth to it because I am able to be in my own head while I am working out. It is me time, and as any parent can tell you, me time is a very rare and special treasure. So maybe it wasn't a lie, or just a quick reply. Even if I am doing it mainly for my juicy booty and other fabulously fatty parts, I really do get more sanity. Because the world knows any sanity in my life at all is a start!

Well, now I get to sleep for two days to recoup and go back to it on Monday! I love to workout, it feels great! Nah, I'm not there yet.....


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Day One...Trying to breathe!

So I went to the gym today. I am all signed up. I had to commit to 13 months. I can do that. I am realllly pumped up this first day, let's see how long that stays!

I went straight to the bike because I figured Heck, I can sit and exercise? That's for me!!! Well, I did 20 minutes and it was 5 miles. My legs felt like jello! Yum, jello....NO Focus!

It actually felt really great to sweat like that for a reason other than just walking to the mailbox! Who am I kidding, in the summer I drive to the mailbox! Needless to say, I feel good about starting this. I am confident that this is going to make an impact on not only my life, but the lives of my family members. I want my husband to have a hot wife and my children to have a mom period. I also want my mom and my grandparents to have pride in me and to then get inspired.

I am setting the alarm for 5:30 am. Back to it tomorrow!

Destiny said I would be fat....she's such a jerk!

I have got to be insane! I am actually going to blog about my weightloss. Whew, so here it goes. That picture? That's me. No, not the cute one in the hat, the fat one. Yep, her.

I am 34 a mother of 3 and I have been married to the man of my dreams for 10 years. I grew up in the San Francisco bay area and I now reside in Hell, oops, I mean the desert. Outside of Las Vegas. Where it is definatley too hot to be fat! I am a photographer, homeschool teacher, chef, maid, taxi, pageant mom, etc, etc, etc.

I have been following a doctors "diet" for the past 5 months, which has consisted of vitamin B-12 shots once a month and Phentermine pills. The only other change I have made to lose weight has been to stop drinking soda (although I cheat). I was up to about 1 liter of pepsi a day. It makes me sick, now, to think I was consuming that much soda everyday.

So far, I have lost 3 dress sizes and I have gone from weighing 287 to 264. I had been doing this to appease my insurance which required a six month doc recommended diet plan before they would pay for a LapBand surgery. I really want the surgery because I had the mindset that I would only lose weight if I am starving myself. My doctor has been against weightloss surgery from the beginning. So I went to the doc for my regular check in last week and he said forget the surgery, you are doing so well, let's get you to lose the weight the right way. So I have decided to heed his advice, and do this the old fashioned way. Plus he is really hot, so it is kind of hard to argue with him.

Ok, that is out of the way...... So here I am. I joined the local gym today and I am going to blog my story. I am actually excited for this challenge. I come from a family of large people so the poor habits have been handed down generation to generation. My family even came to America from Germany and opened a bakery!!! We were made to be big! Almost everyone in my family has either diabetes, heart issues, sleep apnea. You name it, we got it! I am ready to break this horrible family curse and make sure my kids grow up healthy, happy and thin!